We just kicked off our Boundaries study last night and I am already loving it. Someone in our journey group mentioned that she doesn’t think she’s a very good friend because she’s become such a homebody. I instantly thought ‘that’s me!’.
As we explored the idea that wanting to home with your family, enjoying the simpler things does in some ways make you a bad friend, I realized I am a bad friend. I hardly ever want to leave the house. Not in a scared or cranky sort of way, but I just love being at home. To the point where when I am committed to doing things outside of the house, such as MOPS, Daddy often has to convince me to get out the door. Once I get there, I have a good time – it’s not that. I do enjoy the people I see there, and no one can relate to me like those mommies can. Â
But, my kids make me laugh every day. Daddy and I still giggle like teenagers at the most redunkulous things. After ten years, we still like each other, and if push came to shove, they are who I want to be with. Why is that so wrong?
Then, one of the gals mentioned that she felt like saying ‘no’ to things actually does make you a good friend. It sounds strange, but the more I think about it, the more I realize she’s right. It’s not that I don’t care about people – because the opposite is true. I think and pray over my friends often. Almost daily I think about all who matter to me. I am just not one of those people who has to see them in order to feel connected and I am realizing that often that mindset is misunderstood.
So, just to confess: My name is Angie, and I am a bad friend. But please know, just because I am a total flake and because I don’t make a huge effort to make plans, I still love you guys more than my luggage.
Is that weird?
Glad to see someone put this out there!! I’m the same way. If Nathan is home from work then we’re going to be together. As a SAHM I have quite a bit of time during the weekdays to spend with friends and have playdates, etc… and I absolutely love to do this. However if someone asks me to do stuff in the evening or on the weekend I will almost always say no, not b/c I’m mean or don’t want to see them, just b/c I need that down with my hubby and kid. I don’t think that makes you a bad friend. I know if we really need each other we’ll be there and that’s what matters most. I love you 🙂